Weather Madness

Why the fuck can't I ever watch a sporting event without some douche bag weatherman fucking my shit up? Every time some significant sporting event happens that I want to watch, be it the NCAA basketball championship, the NBA finals, a BCS bowl game, the World Series or the Super bowl; a thunderstorm will roll into town and I have people like Travis Meyer interrupting every couple of minutes just to tell me, "Yes, it's still raining...yes there is a storm...no, there probably won't be a tornado..."

Then what the hell are doing popping into my television? It's a goddamn thunderstorm! It storms here...ALL THE TIME! If we aren't in immediate danger, then go the hell away. Oh, and another thing--quit shrinking the picture to run your stupid weather crawl. There is no reason for a "severe weather alert" for a stupid, measly thunderstorm. Floods? Ice? Blizzard? Hurricane? Zombies? Alien invasion? Please, interrupt me. If not, shove your 4-D radar up your ass.

TheReluctantTulsan.

Lando's Premiere

We at the Reluctant Tulsan would like to welcome a new contributor to the site:

Hey there.

About a month ago, I was approached by the Reluctant Tulsan to join him in the enlightenment of all things Tulsa and beyond. It took less than two drinks from my Jack and Coke to agree to join forces in the process of sharing the good word.

As a bit of background, I’ve known Mr. Tulsan for some time. We go back to a different city in a different time when the only thing that mattered was what you were drinking at the moment and where you were going after last call.

I have a background in writing, specifically journalism, so naturally the invitation was probably easy for him to ask me to join in web logging – also known as the current method of leaving our mark in the history that is the Internet.

OK, enough of the rhetoric.

I love to write, but for the past month I’ve been torn on what to write. It’s actually been a bit gut wrenching. I’ve been known to blog on my Myspace page, and I have a small following, but this is a different deal. I actually feel the pressure not to disappoint.

So I want to know what it is you want to read about. I could blab on about sports or what movies I think you should invest your time in. I can go on and on about the state of our politics. I could spend my time critiquing the music I believe you should be listening to and the stuff you should be avoiding.

Basically, I’m giving you the chance to dictate what it is I write about. I’m up for any format. I’m open to you to sending random questions with me giving my unique responses. I’d also be willing to take a topic and expand on it from my point of view.

The Reluctant Tulsan is writing great things, but I’m ready to branch out and take this into a different direction.

So feel free to click the comment button below and leave your suggestions. I’ll give it some time, but if this fails to work, be prepared for my random ramblings on the current state of anything I feel like writing about.

Either way, it’s going to be a good time, and I look forward to it.

Sincerely,

Lando

Returned From Hiatus...Why You Don't Give Rides to Strangers...

I've been on a 14 day hiatus or so and have finally returned with updates.

Last week, as I was leaving my apartment I see a rather large, bald-headed man running down the street. "No big deal," I thought. People jog around here all the time, I think. So he stops near me as I get in my car and he waves at me, I notice he isn't wearing shoes...I drive forward a little, his arms drop in frustration. So, I stop.
"What's up?"
"Dude, can you give me a ride? I'm only going two blocks, just take me down to 17th."

I did mention this man was huge, right? And kind of rather scary looking. Ok, so he gets in the car and he is shit-faced. My god, was the man drunk. This was evident because he told me to take him down to 17th...which was the street we were currently on, the same street he was previously running down; and he smelled quite strongly of alcohol. And, as previously stated, he wasn't wearing any shoes.

As we're driving he keeps saying, "It's a bad deal, man."
I ignore him. I do not want this drunken, redneck Hercules of a man telling me anything. He repeats, "It's a bad deal, man." I remain steadfast in my ignorance.

He then says, "I normally don't drink, but I just found out, about twenty minutes ago, that someone, this guy, has been molesting my daughter."
"Oh my god," I say.
"That's awful."
He agrees, because he then says, "So, I'm on my way to kill him."

The sincerity in his voice gave me chills. He then turns his head towards me and says, "but you didn't hear that, and you never met me, but you'll read about it. Here, you can let me out here. Thanks for the ride."

So, after a debate with myself, I decided to call the police. I have yet to hear from them, or any local news outlet, of the result. I am somewhat frightened of this man, having seen where I live and actually, physically being inside my car, barging over one night and expressing (violently) his disappointment with me alerting the authorities. But knowing the Tulsa Police Department, they probably drove through the apartments' parking lot where I dropped him off, decided there wasn't anything of interest, and then went and arrested some black kids.

Is this a great town or what?

Bombs Over Tulsa

For those of you who haven't heard, a practice bomb was dropped on a Tulsa apartment complex near 51st and Wheeling Thursday afternoon. My only comment, "What the fuck? Seriously?"
Word is though, that the douche didn't even realize it was gone until he went to drop it for real. I just can't even believe the US military (even the national guard) could do something so stupid. No one was injured.


Channel 2's News Report on the story.

Wilco Tonight!

Wilco tonight at Cain's Ballroom. See you there. Review of the show coming shortly.

More Annoying Little Links...D-O-U-C-H-E-B-A-G Spells Tom Coburn

For reasons unexplained and not understood I was rather touched by this picture of screenwriter Diablo Cody are her Oscar for "Juno". You can find another Diablo Cody blog here.

Another Tulsa blog, Alternative Tulsa, posted this yarn about Senator Tom Coburn for the politically minded.

In addition to AT's thread, I have posted below the actual response, ver-fucking-batim, from our esteemed junior senator's office addressed to yours truly in regards to my concerns over a potential conflict with another Middle-Eastern nation. You would think a US senator's staffers would double check these things...before I post them all over the internet. Absolutely nothing has been edited or changed by me, except for the removal of my name (in brackets).

Dear Mr. [Reluctant Tulsan],

Thank you for your message regarding a potential war with Iran. I'm sorry you have felt ignored by your representatives in the past, but I assure you I read each letter I receive from an Oklahoman. I you're your comments to heart.

I do agree with you we should not be afraid to talk to Iran, and we are doing precisely that behind the scenes and out of the public spotlight. Make no mistake, diplomacy has been and remains our first-option in dealing with Iran, and it is my hope diplomacy will prove successful. Years of negotiations and discussions have produced a United Nations resolution placing sanctions on the current regime, but I am not convinced it will be enough to deter them from their pursuit of nuclear weapons. At this point, though, I have no intention to vote for a war with Iran.

With that said, there is no doubt Iran has had at least some role in insurgent operations in Iraq. There are indications they have supported, financed and equipped Shiite militias in Iraq. We have acted swiftly to cut off this support and we will continue to do so. Iran's desire to establish itself as the dominant force in the Middle East cannot be allowed to manifest itself in Iraq.

The Iranian regime, even without nuclear weapons, is a threat to the world. For decades, Iran has been exporting terrorism abroad while terrorizing its own citizens. The United States must do everything it can to not only prevent Iran from obtaining nuclear weapons capabilities but also prevent Iran from continuing to bolster terrorist efforts around the globe. Therefore, I believe all options should be on the table when it comes to Iran. Since Iran's leaders have demonstrated a desire and commitment to see America's destruction, it would be against our best interest to limit our actions without consideration for current events.

We should keep in mind the words of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad when he said, "We will soon experience a world without the United States and Zionism . Undoubtedly, I say that this slogan and goal is achievable, and with the support and power of Allah, we will soon experience a world without the United States and Zionism and will breathe in the brilliant time of Islamic sovereignty over today's world."

Again, I appreciate your input and suggestions and I look forward to hearing from you again.

Sincerely, A

Tom Coburn

United States Senator

TC: BRB

Returned From St. Louis--Zero Confirmed Nelly Sightings

However! Not all was lost. We all had a great time at The City Museum and going to see Avenue Q at the Fabulous Fox Theatre...we also went to the mall.

Pictures to follow soon...maybe

One of the most startling things about the trip was the difference in road quality between the states of Missouri and Oklahoma. It's literally (to steal a phrase) like a line is drawn and once you cross that line the roads either turn great or unbearably shitty depending on direction headed.